I went to Laman Seni at Section 7, Shah Alam today for some creative soul-feeding session. I've heard about this street art gallery many times before but have never actually made my way to see it despite living only 15 minutes away from it.

 It was as nice as I expected and also as crowded as I expected it to be. I pretty much made a wrong decision in coming on a weekend because well, apparently Malaysians use their weekends wisely by lingering around malls and coffee shops when they could just be re-charging their day off from work at home watching Law and Order or sipping tea while cozying up in bed with a book. But then again; that's just me. So I'll just post up some pictures here;

 There are still more at the gallery (-well it wasn't really a gallery as you would call it as it was more of a back door alley full of street art) but these were all I managed to take amongst the crowd before the rain came pouring heavily down. Talk about luck, huh?

 But overall, it was a good experience. I've never been to anything like this before so it was fun to actually do something new which I have promised myself I'd do much more of just to open my eyes and re-discover everything.

 I have so much respect for all the people who were involved and even more for the artists themselves. To have so much passion to be able to portray something so unique and beautiful for everyone to see is just so amazing. Which made me re-think to what my passion was and what I've been doing to fulfill it. My number one passion is reading, especially poetry. And second is of course this; writing. Writing practically releases my soul.

But I wonder if I'll have the courage enough to actually use my passion to portray something as beautiful as these artists have portrayed..

 On a lighter note; so snakes and ladders, anyone?

 So, social network. We have Facebook, Twitter, and urm, all kinds of other social networking sites I'm probably not cool enough to know.

 I've actually been off the radar on Instagram for a couple of months now. I don't know. Maybe its the little negative side of me that just doesn't wanna see people with their new stuff, their happy faces, etc. Or maybe its just the me that would like to keep Instagram sacred as I've always known it to be since that evening of July. I leave it like that. I can't remember the last time I posted a picture. All I know is that, I just don't feel good doing it anymore. But if my name does happen to pop up on your phone screens indicating I have liked one of your posts; feel special. Rarely do I go on Instagram nowadays either than to check up on my favorite people. :)

 I've started running away from Twitter lately. Honestly, I basically just deleted every social networking site apps I had on my phone. So if I really wanted to indulge and waste my time on it, I'd had to push myself and go to all the trouble of using Google Chrome. Which, is as we all know, is pretty much troublesome as it is.

 But I still post on Facebook sometimes, a quote here and there, just to make sure everybody knows I'm still alive. Though, I'm not sure anybody would care much.

 I did realize one thing though. My mind's been working its creative side much much much better than before. I can be in the car driving and my mind would just space out and come out with paragraphs and paragraphs of sentences I didn't even know I could come up with. So that's a delight. I like the feeling. Of thinking. And keeping it to ourselves. Or just jotting words down on a tissue paper. It makes me feel good.

So I'm gonna do that more often. You can always find me on WhatsApp, or Line. I haven't gone totally anti-social; mind you. I'm just letting my brain do all the talking this time. So forgive me if I space out sometimes when we meet up; it's been happening a lot lately.

I've been working for almost 3 months now.

I didn't really choose Emerio as the place to spread my wings; but it came at a time when I was at my lowest and anything besides staying at home was better.

And after 3 months, Emerio has really taught me a lot. I've gained experience of working on shifts, with the Japanese, and also I've learnt the many quirks working people have.

But...that's it.

I can't talk about working in Emerio so passionately as I've watched my bestfriend talk about his work everytime we meet up. And somehow, I have envied him and have tried to vicariously lived through his passion.

And after our long talk last night; which was one we haven't had for in such a long time, he made me realize how much I've actually strayed from who I am deep inside.

I've been so caught up in being emotionally torn apart, that I've actually lost sight of the true me.

For people who know me, they know well that I don't like to do things when it doesn't involve passion.

I can't say how long I'll be staying in Emerio, and I don't even know what I'll do next.

But i do realize, like what my bestfriend said to me last night; that to achieve happiness I have to fulfill my desires first.

Some soul-searching is on the way.

 And to my best friend who stayed up with me until 2 AM just to remind me of the person I once envisioned myself to be; Thank You. 

Its okay.

I've been on a limbo with life lately. 

 I have my good days and bad days; but mostly the latter.

 Sometimes all I wanna do is curl up in bed and let all the memories explode in my chest. To cry everything out until I dry out my tears to only be left with emptiness.

 But then one day I realized; its okay.

 Its okay to wanna feel everything all at once. Its okay to wanna just mourn over something that was once so beautiful in your life.

Its okay.

Its okay to feel human.

 I just have to remember to rise up again after each fall. Because with each rise, I will grow stronger.